修改为：The registrant who fails to make such an application within that period may be granted a grace period of six months. 六、过于繁琐( redundant) 人民依照法律规定，通过各种途
修改为：→The registrant who fails to make such an application within that period may be granted a grace period of six months.
六、过于繁琐( redundant)
人民依照法律规定，通过各种途径和形式，管理国家事务，管理经济和文化事业，管理社会事务。
原译文：The people administer state affairs and manage economic, cultural and social affairs through various channels and in various ways in accordance with the law.
修改提示：汉语擅用排比，英文无此习惯。此处可以将各种“事务”连起来，一气呵成。
修改为：The people administer state, economic, cultural and social affairs through …
民事诉讼当事人不服地方人民法院第一审判决的，有权在判决书送达之日起十五日内向上一级人民法院提起上诉。
原译文：If a litigant in civil proceedings disagrees to a judgment of first instance rendered by a local people’s court, he or she has the right to appeal to the people’s court at the next higher level within 15 days upon the service of the court verdict.
修改提示：可用后置定语，使行文简洁。
修改为：
A litigant in civil proceedings dissatisfied with a judgment of first instance rendered by a local people’s court may appeal to … (render，作出；给予，提供)；
the court verdict (verdict指“陪审团裁决”)→ the judgment。
合资企业应向中国银行或中国银行批准的银行开立账户。
原译文：A joint venture shall open an account with the Bank of China or a bank approved by the Bank of China.
修改提示：可用thereby使行文简洁。
修改为：A joint venture shall open an account with the Bank of China or a bank approved thereby.
七、滥用标点
企业和政府有关部门的领导干部，因工作过失给企业和国家造成较大损失的，由政府主管部门或有关上级机关给予行政处分。
原译文：Leading cadres of enterprises and governmental departments concerned, who have caused the enterprises and the state big losses due to work faults, shall be disciplined by the competent government agency or its superior agency.
修改提示：cause sb. sth. 结构不当；定语从句的逗号使用不当。
修改为：Leading cadres of enterprises and governmental departments concerned who have caused big losses to the profit-seeking enterprises and the state owing to their negligence in work shall be disciplined by the competent government agency or its superior agency.
修改说明：
(1) cause sb. sth. 结构应当改为cause sth. to sb.结构。
(2) 去掉定语从句的逗号，因为：限制性定语从句起明确的限定作用，在句中不可缺少，否则会影响句子的含义。非限制性定语从句通常起补充说明作用，删除后一般也不影响句子的主要思想；有时相当于一个分句；修饰具有唯一性的名词时，要用非限制性定语从句。
例如：
When he was 18, he went to a technical school in London, which was the largest city he had ever seen. (逗号不能删除)
Then he met Mary, who (and she) invited him to a party. (逗号不能删除)
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